Mistakes People Make Selling

This Week’s Video

If you follow me on Twitter at all, you know I hop on my soapbox all the time about how people make basic mistakes while pitching through social media. I’ve said it in multiple threads, I’ve said it on my last video about marketing, and I’ll probably say it more in the future. “But Mike,” you might ask, “What are those mistakes people make?”
That’s where this week’s video comes in. Behold, several of the common mistakes people make while pitching, all nicely illustrated:

What Goes Wrong?

I give a lot of examples in the video, but I want to unpack what I consider to be the most important theme of the video here explicitly. Theoretically, the sales process has distinct steps. A person at each stage of the process has different needs. And the stage that is screwed up by far more than anything else?

The Hook

The hook. Always lead with your hook. If you take nothing else away from these blog posts or my videos or any other time I get on this soap box, please please please just remember always lead with your hook. Let’s unpack one example…

“Hey all, my book is currently on sale for 99 cents. I’m really excited for it. It’s the CHRONICLES OF XANDERVINE. It’s like Goku got dropped into The Witcher.”

Some Guy on the internet. Probably.

This isn’t as egregious as the examples in the videos. It’s still relatively short, and the actual hook – “It’s like Goku got dropped into The Witcher” is really interesting. And yet this piece is burying that lead under some generic info about your sale price and a title that, at the moment, people don’t care about. Here’s a better way to write it:

Imagine Goku got dropped into the Witcher. That’s the CHRONICLES OF XANDERVINE. It’s currently on sale for 99 cents; click (HERE) to learn more!”

A slightly better marketing guy on the internet. Probably.

The only thing I did here is move that hook from the tail end, after all that other nonsense, to the front of the post. Suddenly, BAM, people are scrolling and they see that sentence and they can stop if it catches their interest. If that sounds like I’m being dramatic, literally Thursday this week I was scrolling through my feed and a post had an AWESOME four-word pitch; I stopped and went “OOOOOHHH?” and then started reading more about it. If they hadn’t put that pitch first, I would have just kept scrolling.

This simple change, putting the hook first, already makes this piece MUCH stronger. You could do more – add a couple sentences setting up the core conflict or characters or, something else to tell us more about the book. I would argue that’s more important than the sale price or the title at this point, but I also think this is just a very poor title anyway. The thing is, even if you don’t dive into all the minutia, leading with the hook already is a vast improvement. So, really, if you take nothing else, please please please, writers, always lead with your hook.

Bonus: Behind the Scenes

In order to pick up the accoutrements for Ron’s character, I found a small costume shop near my house. I didn’t think anything of this, until I pulled up to US Toy and, beside it, COSTUMES AND MAGIC. This merited a raised eyebrow but not much else at the moment – I was in a hurry, after all. When I went in there was a standard collection of costumes (without any of the egregiously slutty costumes one typically sees in Halloween). This didn’t surprise me too much, but after I waded through an aisle of different costume bits, I came to the middle section of the store. Glass display cases ran the entire length of it, filled with stage make-up, professional high grade wigs, and more. Along the opposite wall were books. Magic books.

This is a magic store.

This was basically my face.

I ended up having a delightful conversation with the woman behind the counter. Her parents are professional clowns, she’s a professional face painter (“This is my stay out of trouble job”). Apparently, this store has been around Kansas City for literally decades. In their old location they were, by square footage, the largest magic shop in the United States. I honestly had no idea, and I likewise didn’t realize that there are not one but apparently two Magician’s guilds in Kansas City (I think?). Oh. And there is a large contingent of professional face-painters, makeup artsits, and folks who work on VFX for local filmmakers (me: “We have local filmmakers?”).

I did’t realize ANY of this existed; it makes my inner 12… or 20… year old happy. Let’s be clear – I have no aspirations of becoming a professional Magician. But every now and again I pull out a deck of cards and dabble, or try to learn something neat for fun. So I’m sure I will go back to this store a lot because of the content, but also because it just sounds like there are so many interesting people there.

So, if you’re ever in Kansas City and have an overwhelming need for 1) a Toy Store, 2) a shop for Magic Tricks, or 3) professional grade costume accessories, boy howdy do I have the store for you.

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